Constantly Children at Heart: Zodiac Signs

 Aries Is a Ram that never grew out of diapers more ugly? Forgive me for putting that image in your head. I was immature. Aries can have the attention span of a flea and the disposition of a meth-addicted pit bull as an adult

Fire signs ruled by Mars—the planet that gives us the phrase “martial”—are ready to fight over the smallest issues. You didn't add enough milk to their Frosted Flakes

Taurus The Bull's Olympic-level intransigence shows their eternal childishness. They'll refuse to do what you say for spite. It doesn't matter what you say. If you gently desperately


 They'll cut off their nose to spite their face. As Gandhi remarked, “People who cut off their nose to spite their face will just leave the whole world without noses

 Cancer Cancer, the most emotional and often offended sign, is theatrical like an opera clown and ruined like a cup of yogurt left out in the Saharan sun. They retain a grudge like a bar of 24-karat gold and cry at the drop of a ha

They will wail so much that you will want to put a pacifier in their mouth, turn off the light, and lock them in their soundproof nursery.

 Gemini The immature Twin, not the mature one, is being discussed. Mature ones are great to be around. Geminis' nasty passive-aggressive nature is so annoying that you'll want to put them in a baby rocket ship and hurl them into space. 

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